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dann bloggen wir mal ... Vorurteile zur Thai - Farang Beziehung teil 1

von am 03.06.10 um 01:20 (2761 Hits)
Blog Erfahrung nr. 1
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ein Thai schrieb bei Stickman eine Aufstellung zur Beziehung zwischen Thai - Farang
Teil 1
Farang Men / Thai Women — A Reality Check
by Jayson

The topic of Thai women and farang men is probably the most discussed—and misunderstood—topic amongst your readership. For the most part, the vast majority of your authors are still pretty clueless about Thai women and what makes them tick. Hence, the problems that western men have with Thai women will continue until they truly understand the dynamics at play. And as always, I’m here to help. Or more specifically, provide a reality check. It’s easy to see how farangs can get such a distorted view of Thai women. They only know Thai women in the most superficial sense, or from where they have the easiest access. Which is to say the bar scene. They get fawned over by Thai women every bar they go to and go back and tell their friends that “Thai women love us!” Well, Thai bargirls love farangs. Or rather, they love how you’re stupid with your money.

This is going to be a submission containing lists. Everybody loves lists. Because it cuts to the heart of the matter and provides specific info in easy-to-read, bullet format. The first list is going to be a list of the characteristics I see of the vast majority of Thai women who are with farangs, in no particular order. So without further to do, this is the first list:

List #1: Typical Thai women with farangs in Thailand


From the impoverished areas of the northeast.

Poor with little to no prospects.

Below average level of education.

Single mothers.

Have had their heart’s broken by a Thai guy.

Unattractive, or at least below average in appearance.

Nearly every Thai women with farangs possess one or more, if not all, of these traits. There are always exceptions, but honestly, this list is pretty spot on. Because even if your Thai gal doesn’t possess traits 1 through 5, most likely, she’ll be number 6. This last one, the unattractive trait (by Thai standards), is particularly important as I’ll discuss later. But there are reasons why this is so, which is what we’ll cover by the completion of this submission.

Now this is where the farang logic perplexes me. Firstly, farang guys will say that Thai women are only about money, that’s all these women care about. Yet, as farangs are considered to be wealthier than the average Thai guy, why do only the most undesirable of Thai women gravitate towards farangs? Why wouldn’t the best and brightest be lining up to hook up with a farang, any farang, if that is all that mattered to Thai women? In fact, we have the exact opposite most of the time. Truly attractive Thai women who could have most any guy will almost never choose a farang guy. Hmmm, why is that? Let’s move on.

Many of your readers / writers, or these who desire a long term relationship, are in pursuit of these so-called “good” Thai girls, or “normal” Thai girls. What does that mean, exactly? A “good” Thai girl, or good person in general, is so subjective that I won’t even go there. But I can talk about what a “normal” Thai girl is. A “normal” Thai girl is simply the vast majority. Not good or bad. Not right or wrong. We can say that most “normal” men are straight. But does that mean that gay men are not “normal?” Not in a sense of whether it’s right or wrong, but simply because the majority—or the norm—is not gay. So here’s List 2, what constitutes normal Thai women in Thailand.

List #2: Normal Thai girls in Thailand


Doesn’t speak English, or prefers to speak Thai even when she can speak some English.

Doesn’t normally read Stickman, ThaiWheezer, or any other English websites.

Doesn’t work in bars.

Doesn’t date or marry non-Thais.

Doesn’t give farangs much thought in any given day.

Hasn’t traveled much overseas.

Would prefer to marry and have a family with a good Thai man.

Now you’re probably thinking that there are tons of Thai women looking for farang mates....and you’d be right. But they’re either not normal, or most likely, have one or more traits from list #1. What does a normal white woman in America seek? A white man, of course. So what would you say about a white woman who prefers black men? If you’re white, you’ll probably say she’s deviant. I don’t think it’s wrong, but it just simply isn’t the norm. Just like Thai women who prefer farangs. There’s a few out there and if they don’t fit the profile of List #1, they most likely grew up overseas and/or are deviant. Nothing wrong with that, but it’s just not normal. It isn’t normal in Thailand, just like interracial dating is still not completely normal in the states.

So what is important to a Thai woman, when seeking a mate? Well it could be a number of things, like sense of humor, status in society, income, looks, age, compatibility, integrity, etc. But the single most important thing for a Thai woman (a “normal” one that is), based on my intense observation and years of studying this topic, is (drum roll)...COMMUNICATION! Well this probably comes as a shock to most farangs, thinking that Thai women are all about money and family and fun and face (fill in the blank with your wrong perception). A normal Thai girl who seeks a normal relationship really wants someone she can communicate with. Someone to share her dreams and aspirations, and to laugh with, and to mourn with, and to consult with, and so on. Someone who can hold his own around her friends and family when they’re conversing. It also goes to the compatibility and shared culture aspects, which are also important things to most normal Thai women. The key here is that the communication has to be in Thai. As I’ve mentioned in List #2, Thai women don’t want to deal with English (or French, or German, or Japanese, or whatever). At least not on an intimate, day-to-day level. It’s freakin hard work! Hell, how many American women do you know that are bi-lingual? Not many, if you don’t include the Mexican and Asian Americans. So why should Thai women have to deal with this burden? Short answer is they don’t! And what sort of women would forego the most important aspect of her being, that which makes her who she is, to be with a man who doesn’t speak Thai? More on that later.
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  1. Avatar von antibes
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    Ich hatte den Stickman zu Beginn meiner Ehe vor 7 Jahren gelesen. Er scheint in der Farangszene Bangkok`s u.a. ein sehr wichtiger Kenner des Milieus zu sein.
    Ob man diese Kost so locker verdaut wage ich zu bezweifeln. Seine Darstellungen der Bargirls haben in mir tiefes Misstrauen gegenüber diesen Mädels gesät. Bestätigt oft durch haarsträubende Beiträge von anderen "Opfern", die in den diversen Thaiforen ihre Geschichte erzählten.

    Lebt eigentlich der Stickman noch?
  2. Avatar von DisainaM
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    Stickmanns Beiträge erscheinen fast wöchentlich auf seiner Webseite, und sind nach wie vor Kult,
    auch wenn er etwas ruhiger geworden ist, lebt er einen journalistischen Spagat in Bangkok Expatswelt.

    Stickman Weekly, Bangkok's weekly column for farangs!
  3. Avatar von hupe
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    ..... aber recht hat er beinahe immer behalten!